tl;dr – NoFap works
Exactly one year before from this post: here
I was trying to get on NoFap even before I discovered this very subreddit, and my longest streak was 40 days. 12 months ago, after going through some turbulent times with women, I decided that enough is enough and that the focus of my life should be changed. It was supposed to be only 90 days, but I just continued on pressing.
Benefits and achievements
My biggest achievement is definitely getting rid of this skin condition consisting on eczema / psoriasis like patches (but without scales) on palms and heels that were bugging me for years. I reported it here. First and foremost, I am not a doctor and I am just reporting my experience. So, combination of NoFap and daily cold showers somehow managed to cure me of it.
Sex and erectile function
Some 90 days ago, I started to have wet dreams, culminating with two wet dreams in a row in one evening. I literally got a wet dream, woke up, washed my self and changed my underwear, went to sleep only to be woken up by the same thing. Wet dreams seem to be a norm for me now, happening on a regular basis every few weeks or so. Morning erections are strong. I didn’t have constant sex in the past year, but on those occasions I didn’t have any problems – and I didn’t start NoFap because I had much of the problems before.
I still procrastinate. I still have issues with eating junk food. However, I am changing my behavior on a daily basis. I became a regular blood donor, lost some 20 pounds over the year, started avoiding bad foods when I muster will to do so. I also exercise semi-regularly and managed to develop some muscle.
I found that on NoFap my emotions are running deeper. When I am happy, I am ecstatic, and when I am depressed I am at the very bottom of the Pit of Despair. Guess it has something to do with clearing out of dopamine loop.
I am all over the place here. I certainly had my successes, my approach and total anxiety is all time low, however sometimes I am out of the sync with one I am aiming for. In those situation, my assertiveness overwhelms my companion and things fall apart. On half of the other occasions, it worked perfectly well, so I guess I have to tune my behavior specifically to the person I am with more precisely.
How To Do NoFap Properly
First find your reason for doing it. My trigger was fallout with women, but that was not my reason: my reason was the will to change the focus in my life from chasing emotionally and physically unavailable females and massaging my reproductive organs when viewing historical records of people having faked sex in a bad quality to becoming a man that will live his life, cage his demons and dominate this opportunity given to him. This is very important. If your motivation is weak, you will be weak and you will fail.
I already told this multiple times here, but I always think it should be repeated more: already overcoming one major addiction in my life (smoking), my best advice to you all is: forget artificial barriers when quitting addiction. On the NoFap journey, it meant that I didn’t use any web filters, didn’t delete xxx material from my pc (even though I deleted it afterwards to free disk space for other things), didn’t share my struggles with people in real life, didn’t run out of the room when someone on the room opened up a picture of naked female etc. I have this theory that urges like that come from inside, and your have to strengthen your inside to be able to resist outside influence. By blocking outside influence, your inner strength is underdeveloped and the moment someone or something overwhelms you with triggers, you will fail. For this reason it is important to embrace your urges and learn how to contain them, rather than let them run rampant while you are hiding in the hole in the floor. To be clear, I am not saying here that you should go to tubesites and strap yourself to a chair while browsing porn for hours (we are trying to avoid that, remember?), I am just saying that you do your business as usual and when trigger comes try to remove them gracefully and by being in total control.
Cold showers from day one. My immune system is also through the roof, this is the first time in many years that I haven’t been sick even for a day, while my coworkers are falling left and right.
When high tides hit you, just call it a day. Put yourself in a fetal position if you must, go to the bed do everything necessary to avoid relapsing. Don’t get drunk. Don’t go to a porn site. Sit on your hands if you have to and just ride it through. It will pass, I promise you. Good luck!
What lies ahead
I am a heavy procrastinator. Once I was with a girl that I warned about this flaw of mine and after sometime she said she couldn’t believe that someone is capable of being so lazy. I literally managed to screw some major opportunities in my life only because I wasn’t in the mood to do something about them. To be exact, Fapping was my second biggest issue after procrastination. This has to go in 2015.
What is promising is that the first time in my life I managed to exert the constant effort for a year to accomplish something. This is huge for me. By doing that I prepared my mental circuit for what currently is the biggest battle in my life.
Urges under control, I think I can finally focus completely on building a side business I always wanted and getting physical endurance I plan to have.
People wise, it is time to separate the wheat from the chaff, so I will do my best to seek and cultivate relationships with people that are worthy of spending time with and avoid those that are just dead weights. Same elimination procedure will affect my other bad habits, like eating junk food, browsing aimlessly, and generally wasting time, body and mind on harmful and uninteresting things. Little by little I might become a person I want to be.
Whatever happens it will be an interesting year 🙂
I couldn’t have done this without NoFap sub. Seriously, this place changed my life. Thank you all for that.
That’s it. If you dedicate to NoFap, only good things will happen to you. Find your motivation, set it in stone and just do it. You will be surprised.