“Climb a mountain, tell no one.” This bit of wisdom was the top voted comment in a year old thread about how to be a man. It has stuck with me. It is about struggle and developing inner strength that needs no external validation.
As nice as it is to get support from SOs or here with the stories and badges. In the end, a true man’s struggle is his own.
Inner strength comes when you become a man for yourself first. It starts with self control and proceeds to self confidence and self growth and self esteem – all of which improve self control and the cycle repeats.
My own personal nofap journey is about self control first. I am using my desire and intensity and redirecting it towards meaningful growth: physical, mental and my career.
It is very hard at times.
My personal form of relief is to listen to loud music on my way home from the gym and growling and grunting as the incredibly strong man I am. I then draw on those moments throughout my day both when I feel weak and when I need strength. I am more assertive, more aggressive and more dominant.
I wish you guys well.
These techniques are a form of cognitive behavioral therapy. Self-talk is a critical part of rewiring your neural pathways and resetting your way of thinking. They do not need to be “true” every day and every minute of my life. But they do help me.